Remember
by z5k1x0xk155
Summary: Have you ever thought about when you die? I don't mean about the actual act itself but what will happen afterwards? Like the first person to find you, the first person or people that person tells. How will those people react?
1. Death

"'_Have you ever thought about when you die? I don't mean about the actual act itself but what will happen afterwards? Like the first person to find you, the first person or people that person tells. How will those people react? And what happens when those people tell your family, whoever they are? How would your family feel? Would they envy you? Would they still hold that grudge over you for not calling or not doing the dishes or whatever the case may be? And when your family informs some of your best friends and those best friends inform some of your lesser friends and so on and so forth? What then? How do those people react? The people who probably know you best, who knew you inside and out, how will they react, how will they remember you? _

_Now then, everyone has been informed of your passing. The funeral is prepared. How many people attend? How many people in your long or short lifetime have you touched enough for them to dig out their black clothes, to sniffle out a few tears, and miss their favorite shows or time with their loved ones to come to remember who you were? Did you come up with a number? Can you count them on your fingers, maybe your toes? How many of the people you care about do you think will come up with an excuse not to go? They're sick or they're busy. You obviously just weren't that important enough were you?_

_There you are, lying in your coffin, mummified in chemicals and an outfit you would never normally have worn. Who is crying? Your parents? Some family members, a best friend, a lover? Someone who never got to tell you how they felt, another person who regretted something they said, a tear for all the times you had a fight. These people may remember you, but how long will those memories last? How long will their regret or their happiness continue? A few years, a year, a month, a day, or perhaps just that one hour with your cold stillness in front of their eyes._

_There is a eulogy, oh yes, their is always a eulogy. Who will write yours? Your mother? Your father? A best friend? Who will be the other people who make comments at the church? Will there be tears? Maybe a few smiles, perhaps even a laugh. But it all comes down to one thing. _

_Who will hold that grudge about stealing someone else's boyfriend or girlfriend? Who will remember that time when you were kids and played at the beach together? Who will remember your first crush or your first dance? Who will carry on the memories you had or do those memories die with you? Who will remember you as a great person? Who will remember you as a bad person? Who will accidentally laugh when remembering that time milk came out of your nose while you were laughing? Who will remember that you didn't want to ride a bike because you were scared of falling off? Who will cherish the fact that you never wanted to fall in love because you were scared of falling even when you took off the training wheels? Where will these memories come from? Where will they go?_

_Perhaps you won't be remembered at all. Can you think of a reason that you should be remembered? Have you done anything to be remembered for? Will they have any material for your eulogy or will they just have to lie and say that you were a "pretty swell" person? Or will your parents stand in front of many or maybe just a few and say how proud they were of you and remember all the times they tucked you into bed or all the times you fell down and scraped your knees. Every performance or game you ever dragged them to just to see them smile. Will they talk about those things? You can only hope they don't remember the fights you had with them or the ugly words you threw around. All the times you disappointed them, every time you did something spiteful. You can only hope they don't remember that...only hope._

_Perhaps a few of your friends will go up next. The people you maybe cared most about. The people who knew you best. What will they remember? Can they remember? Why would they remember? What were you good at? What were your dreams? Did you reach any goals? Why you were there and what did you achieve? Or perhaps you didn't achieve anything. Will they remember all the times they tried to hook you up with someone? All the dreams you shared with each other in the late nights, all the hopes that would never blossom into promise. Will they remember you the way you want them to? Or will they remember you some other way. The snowball fights, the leaf piles, elementary school, high school, college, notes, fights, games, plays, singing, dancing. Anything and everything, will they remember it all? Will they laugh still when thinking about it or will they regret any of it? What if they can't remember anything? What if their mind goes blank? Perhaps it was better that you had passed when you did then._

_I'm not trying to say that you need to find a reason to be remembered. But it's interesting to think about it isn't it? How many people will care, how will people react? Who did you affect in your lifetime? _

_Hopefully you've touched enough people by now that you have to reason to contemplate your funeral. I pray your funeral isn't soon or mine for that matter. I just hope that we all have people who would come to think about us after we leave this earthly world. And not just for our eulogy, not just a sad memory so they can cry a little and not look silly, not just for that fraction of a moment when they view your body. But for a long time. I hope they think of you for your talents and your abilities, all the times you made fun for everyone else, all the favors you did and even a few unfavorable things. All of these are memories and it's not only you that has them. Make sure your memories are everything and live in the present before it becomes your past. Because sometimes you have to just sit down and think __how will__you be remembered?__'"_


	2. Life

I never really thought about death, particularly my death, very much in my lifetime. I had figured that it would come in time, many years from now, at a time when I was old and weak, ready to be taken off this world. Never would I have thought that everything would end while I was so young. 

If you were to have come up to me and told me that I would die before getting to graduate from high school, I would have laughed in your face. I was a perfectly healthy and happy seventeen year old girl. My life was just beginning. I was a senior in high school, going on two and a half years with my boyfriend, and getting ready for my senior prom, a moment I had looked forward to my whole life.

I would have never believed that everything would come to a sudden stop before all of that. It's not like I had ever done anything to deserve that. I had been a rather nice person, that is I had been nice to the people I associated with, and left others well enough alone. No one actually hated me, a few disliked me, but I wasn't well known to be actually hated by anyone. I had been one of those girls that you seen in the hall everyday, and the girl who sat by the window in your classes. I was the one who got the rather good grades, and let people cheat off her tests, I was the girl who brown-bagged her lunch, and wore her uniform properly instead of rebelling like everyone else.

I wasn't the type of person who was supposed to have their life end so abruptly, without any type of warning. There had been so much that I had wanted to do, so many people I had wanted to talk to, so much I needed to know. It ended so fast, that in my last dying thoughts all I could think of were the things that I forgot to do, things I had been looking forward to, and the people I had been longing to see.

Everyone had told me that in the last second of your life, that one second where you're hanging on by a thread, that you see your whole life. But that's not true. I wished I could of seen my whole life, everything that I had seen and done from my moment of conception to my last breath. If it had only been like that, then maybe I would be at peace now. 

The last hour I had been alive, had been frightening, and I have longed for death, just wanting one second of peace, to escape from the nightmare that had captured me.

Everything that I had been through, all of it, was only supposed to happen in movies. It was supposed to happen to young girls; it specifically wasn't supposed to happen to me. I hadn't done anything to deserve what happened to me. I didn't deserve the pain I went through; one deserved what I had gone through.

I can only hope that now, in the time after I am gone from this tragic world, that someone will find me, and the monster who took me from this world. That they won't be scared, and leave me there alone, waiting to be taken off the cold ground I had been carelessly destroyed on. 

And it is only now, hours after I left my small, broken body, that I realize that it's really over. Everything that the world offers to you, is no longer here for me. I am now waiting for my afterlife to begin, to face my ending, and it is while I wait that I have decided to tell you of the last year I spent in this world.

You see it was on October 31st where my life really started to pick up……


	3. Before it all

**October 31, 2008**

_RIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!_

_RIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!_

_RIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!_

"UGH!"

_:Thump:_

"UHHHHHH!"

_RIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!_

_RIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGG!_

_RIIINNNNNNNNN……………._

After the shrill sound of an alarm clock ended, a young girl of seventeen heaved herself off of the floor, which in surprise response to that dreaded sound she had ended up on her bedroom floor. The girl rolled around on her bed for a few moments, staring up at the white ceiling above her, not wanting to move from her comfy bed. Though after a few moments, the sound of a door opening caused the girl to look up and see a woman in her late thirties with long brown curly hair, and tired looking hazel eyes entering the confines of the small, girlish looking room.

When the woman saw the young girl looking at her, she smiled, and happily said, 

"Good morning sunshine! Have a nice sleep?"

The girl stared at the woman, and then grunted in response, rolling onto her stomach, shoving her face into a pillow.

The woman frowned, then gently grabbed the girls shoulders, shaking them lightly saying,

"C'mon, Amanda, get up! Time for another day of school, then tonight you can go out with your friends!"

The girl, now known as Amanda, shrugged the woman's hands off her shoulders, then turned around and sat up, mumbling lightly,

"Tonight is Halloween isn't it?"

The woman nodded her head, then turned around walking out of the room, shutting the door behind her.

Amanda stretched, then got up out of bed, stopping to look in the mirror on her bureau. She took a step closer, staring at her reflection. She had rather short dark brownish hair, which at this time was wavy and messy from sleep, and her brown eyes were small, and almost Asian-like, even though she wasn't Asian. Amanda rolled her hands into fists, then rubbed the sleep out of her eyes, then looked at the reflection again, giving a laugh-full breath at her reflection. She looked so tired, like she hadn't gotten any sleep. Probably how most people in the morning looked? Amanda then stretched again, and right after took off the over-large t-shirt she was wearing, leaving her only in a small grey camisole.

Amanda opened a drawer in front of her, pulling out a black bra, she swiftly pulled down the cami slightly, putting on the bra, and pulling the cami back up in a few seconds. Right after that she turned around pulling a white button-down blouse off her bed-rail, and quickly putting it on herself and buttoning it up. After buttoning the blouse, she reached back into the drawer pulling out a pair of white knee-highs. Amanda sat down on her bed, rolling up the bottom of her cupcake pajama bottoms, and putting the knee-highs on, then standing up and pulling off the pajama bottoms, disposing of them on the floor. She then again reached into the drawer, this time pulling out a pair of black bikini-cut underwear with little pink and green hearts on them. She pulled off the pink boy-shorts she was wearing, and then put on the bikini-cuts.

After putting on her underwear, Amanda walked over to a large two piece mirror-doored closet, she slide one of the mirrors to the other side, and looked through the closet until she pulled out a dark grey skort. She put the skort on, and tucked her blouse in, then pulled a black sweater out of her closet. She put the sweater over her head, and then pulled her arms through. After she had the sweater on, she went back over to her bureau looking back into the mirror. She then picked up a purple brush, quickly pulling it through her hair, then picking up a thin black pony, and swiftly pulling all of her hair up into a slightly messy pony. Amanda then brushed her bangs, styling them how her liked them over her forehead. 

When she was finished with her hair, Amanda picked up a tube of mascara, carefully putting it on the top of her eye-lashes. After a few moments, she closed the tube, throwing it on the bureau, then running out if her room, on the way grabbing her favorite book, _Phantom of the Opera_…….


End file.
